深圳，香港，广州和赏识教育研讨会之~感想

从深圳回到马来西亚，我发现我这次的赏识旅游真的没白费。在这里，我想要写这次的旅游带给我的启示及感想。

第一，我学会独立。这是我第一次父母不在身旁的旅游。虽然刚开始学习独立时，我也有想父母的时候，但过了几天，我已开始掌握到独立的基本要求。我已学会照顾自己的安全；不舒服时就得赶快吃维他命；自己的财物自己处理；自己收拾行李；言行举止要良好；注意自己的卫生。。。

第二，我学到了感恩。在阿姨家住几晚时，我贪心地要求了许多东西。这时姑姑就说做人要感恩，要感谢阿姨给你那么好的房子住宿。

第三，我在姑姑身上了解了赏识教育的其中一种方式来鼓励我。那天早上,由于姑姑有点忙，她摆脱我帮她把笔记电脑和硬盘搬到楼下去，一边劝我说：“小心！很重要的！别掉！小心一点！”结果我很小心地走下楼梯，只顾着望着自己的脚有没有踏错，却没注意到整个电脑已歪了一边，硬盘就掉了下来，“砰”的一声。这时我说：惨了惨了！但姑姑就温柔地说：“没关系。掉了没什么大不了的！我应该鼓励你，支持你。这样你就不会把硬盘掉了咯！”这时我也很惊讶，心里也觉得舒服。这就是赏识教育的好处。



第四，在香港举办赏识教育研讨会时，我听了几位老师校长的讲座，我有感到感动，感到开心，感到好奇，感到自豪，也有的感到很闷。。哈哈！感动的就如周弘老师和婷婷的讲座，两个都哭出来了。曾校长的我感到是开心和自豪的，他说得又简单，又有趣。通过那么多的赏识专家的讲座，我对赏识教育也了解了多一大步。



第五，当我发现大姐不小心把姑姑的东西弄成一团糟时，姑姑都是用严格的眼神和抱怨的语气对大姐说话，有点像在骂人哦！我就每次在身边说：“姑姑，你抱怨！”那时候我姑姑说：“那一点也是抱怨吗？”她想过是不是带错人来了。结果她和校长商量了这件事，发现原来：抱怨别人的人更需要被赏识。姑姑这次非常感谢我，让大家又学到了一样新知识。我也知道以后任何人抱怨我时，我应该用赏识的语气回答他，纠正他。



第六，我锻炼了一半的我的胆量和信心。感谢曾校长和姑姑给我鼓励，在国际赏识教育研讨会的舞台上和曾校长对话。我望着几百双赏识教育专家的眼睛，说话时有点紧张，吞吞吐吐的。有时我一时慌张，又停顿了，不晓得要说什么。台下的专家们就是在拍手鼓掌，他们都望着我的嘴，我好像变得很出名似的，因为他们都知道是我做了赏识教育双语博客，我终于说出话来了！


在吃晚饭时，我们都要说出赏识教育研讨会过后的感想。轮到我时，我耳朵热了，我紧张了。但还是可以说出10句话，我对自己第一次就可以说那么多感想的能力，非常惊讶。说完后，桌上的人鼓掌还翘起了许多大拇指。顿时觉得轻飘飘的。。。而且，我在赏识教育研讨会是第一次上台，也是国际舞台，就可以当面在那么多专家面前说话，我真的为自己感到自豪。


第七，我知道了赏识教育学校的教学方法和同学的表现。在深圳一间出名的学校，叫中英公学。有一天，我被派到去七年级B班上几个小时的课。那时我更紧张，但我一到课室里时，有两位男生快快站起来让位给我。我那时目瞪口呆，拉着椅子到后面去坐时，看到那位让位给我得那位学生站着来上课，直到今天我还没感谢他呢！上课时，是一位教科学的40-50岁的老师，他们的内容我完全听不懂但是我发现老师问问题时，全班同学就是很有信心的抢答。老师发现到有一位同学的答案和他的一模一样，却没有怀疑他，还笑着拍了他的肩膀说：“你好厉害！你的答案和我一样呢！你怎么猜得出来的？”


老师忙着时，同学们在吵闹，但老师只说了：“3，2，1”全班顿时静了下来，这里的教师学生的纪律比马来西亚的好多了！下课时，一团同学跑来我的方向想和我交流，和我开一开玩笑，结果呢，认识了8 个男生，3个女生。他们都对我很热情，而且我觉得他们这种爱交朋友的行为吸引了。


12月9日，我们将离开深圳，回到马来西亚。当我们把行李搬出来在外面等巴士的时候，我很快得跑到7B班的楼下，谁知真的猜中了！下课时，整堆学生叫我上去。他们知道我要走了，很不舍得我。拍照时，他们都抢着上镜头，他们好像真的要我永远记得他们。拿了电话号码，拍了照，谈了话，说再见。。。巴士来了，他们上课了，他们还在栏杆那里向我道别。我和他们笑了最后一次，便上了巴士到机场去了。我发觉到那里的教师学生和我班的差别非常大。中英公学的校园充满了欢笑声，学生都很乖，又很外向；老师们都是赏识教师，他们的学生多么地开心啊！


这也就是我来中国最深刻的印象，就是在赏识教育的环境下学习，交朋友，感觉是舒畅又快乐的。


我的感想就写到这里，我会珍惜这次学习的每一样知识，记得这一次的旅程真的给我很大的收获。明年的赏识教育研讨会的地点在深圳举办，希望我又可以回来深圳，认识更多的赏识教育，交更多的朋友，更要上多次的舞台，更要让父母知道我到深圳是满载而归的。

抱怨教育的故事 Examples of Complaining Education

从前，有一个男孩，他生病了，想拿一瓶药来喝。喝完时，他听到电话在响，便跑去接，却忘了把药物放回原位。几分钟后，他看见2岁的弟弟把药都打翻了。爸爸见了，骂了那位男孩一句：“你真的是一个没脑的小孩。没有脑的人，怎么做大事啊？我看你的脑袋是废掉了的！”



抱怨教育就是如此，要他脑袋好，却说他没脑袋。。。我看啊！那位男孩的脑袋真的越来越坏了。


Once upon a time, there lived a boy named Robert. One day he fell ill, so he had to take some medicine. After he finished drinking the medicine, the phone rang. He ran to the hall to pick up the call, but he left the medicine un-capped, leaving it on the table. After he finished talking to the phone, he saw his brother playing with the medicine, poured all over the floor. Robert's father scolded him, he said: " You empty-headed boy, how can you be so forgetful? I think your brain had become rubbish!"


This is one of the examples of Complaining Education. The father wanted Robert's brain to work, but he kept complaining that his brain is already useless.




考试要来临了，小明在房间里自修。突然，妈妈进来了。她开始责骂小明为什么那么容易的科目要读那么久，小明没有回答。妈妈说：“再给你十分钟的时间，你就必须把整篇课文的内容都说出来，答不出一题，就打一次！”十分钟很快就过了，但小明还没完全了解课文的内容。妈妈用手把书本一抢，就开始发问问题了。小明好多道题都答不出，被妈妈又骂又打了许多次。结果妈妈生气起来，把小明最喜爱的漫画书给撕烂了，就丢进垃圾桶里，说：“你就是每天只会看漫画，连书都读不进。我看你啊, 别去学校了啦！你也别做人了啦！气死我了！！”小明在一旁发抖，眼泪开始流了，他是多么喜爱那本漫画书啊！“哭什么啊？你再哭，我就打断你的腿！”小明立刻停止哭泣，但心里是多么的伤心害怕，多么的恨这位妈妈，觉得他自己已经没用了，有一点想自杀的念头。。。



小明读不好书是因为父母都在抱怨他，讽刺他，使到他不能专心，而不是那个漫画书的错啊！抱怨教育的父母就是没查清楚事情的始终，就冤枉了自己的孩子啊！








The exam was approaching, Robert was doing his revision in his room. His mom came in and started to scold Robert for revising a easy subject for such long hours. She said to him: " I'll give you ten more minutes to revise. Then I'm going to ask you questions on this chapter. One question can't answer, I whip you one time." After ten minutes, his mom snatched the book from his hands and started to ask questions. But Robert can only answer 1 question out of 10, his mom scolded and whipped him with a broom. At last his mom couldn't control her anger and teared Robert's favourite book into pieces and threw it into the dustbin. She shouted at Robert: " This book is making you useless! Don't go to school anymore! You are only wasting my time and money! I'm very disappointed with you!" At that time, poor Robert was shaking with fear and started to sob. His mom then added: "Why are you crying? I'll cut your legs if you cry!" Robert stopped crying immediately, and his face was calm. But actually he felt like bursting into tears, how he hated his family, and how he wanted to commit suicide...



The reason that Robert couldn't study well was not about his book, but it's his family who kept complaining him, blamed him, scolded him... Complaining education is when parents don't even step one foot ahead to see what had really happened, but their children was being blamed.


成绩不好：打，骂，罚。。。
犯错：骂，讽刺。。。
品行不好：骂，罚，你真没用！。。。。。

成绩不代表全世界啊！成绩不好也是一定会发生的。打骂孩子有用吗？成绩反而没有上进，反而越骂越差！鼓励他们，赏识他们，这样他们才会对自己有信心，成绩才会越赞越好啊！

天下有谁没犯过错呢？犯错后父母骂他们：笨啊！没脑啊！蠢猪啊！，我看啊，原本是好孩子真的会被父母骂到坏孩子了!但如果父母说他们：好啊！你犯错了！没关系，以后不能重犯咯！，孩子心里会有一点惭愧，才会去找出路口，改正错误啊！

所以为什么要学习赏识教育呢？就是能还给孩子一片宽阔草地，让孩子在爱的环境下，能快乐地长大，向日葵开花了！父母们，您们要孩子快乐吗？

快把抱怨教育忘掉吧！就使用孩子幼小时在学走路，学说话的赏识教育去重新教导他们吧！

Poor results: Scolded, Punished, Beaten

Mistakes: Scolded, Punished

Bad behaviour: Scolded, Worst child!....

Results doesn't mean the world to us. Poor results will surely happen to us every time. Scolding and punishing children with poor results, can only made their results even poorer. The more parents scold, the worse their results will be. But how about it when parents encourage them, console them? Only these can give children energy and confidence to themselves, they will try their best and have better and better results next time!

Who hasn't made a mistake on Earth before? Why parents always say: " Stupid child! Empty-headed child! Useless! The worst child in the world!"? Those good children will change to bad ones if parents continue to do this to them. But if parents choose to appreciate them, children will realise their mistakes and will try to turn over a new leaf.

Why all of us should learn Appreciation Education? Then children will grow up happily in a world of love, and soon the Sunflower Will Bloom! So parents, do you want your children to live happily and grow up happily?

Throw away the Complaining Education and start educating your children using the way that parents once used when children were young and learning how to talk and walk. That is called APPRECIATION EDUCATION

给老师们的话 Teaching Teachers To Appreciate

我班的老师教导我们11个月了，非常谢谢您的教导。我觉得您们对待学生的方式还有进步的空间。也希望全世界各国的老师都能赏识学生！


Thank you for our class teachers who had been teaching us for 11 months this year. But I think some of you should learn how to appreciate yoursleves and your families. And of course, students too. This post is mainly for teachers, but it also helps in parents.


首先我先列出来当学生做错时老师们处理的方式：



1。罚站


2。抄写文章


3。狠骂


4。甚至打学生

对不起可能我说得太过火了，但我一定要告诉您们，如果您们想要学生成绩顶呱呱，或是品行良好，打骂是没用的。我也了解当学生顽皮时您们火冒充天的心情，但在赏识教育的眼里，学生永远是乖的。


First let me list out the ways teachers treat/punish their students when they make mistakes:



1. Stand outside the classroom


2. Copy sentences 20 times+


3. Scold


4. Being beaten seriously


Sorry, maybe I said it too rough. But I must tell all teachers that: If you want your students to get good marks, or you want them to have a good attitude, SCOLDING & BEATING is NO USE. I know what teachers feel when their students are naughty. But in Appreciation Education, students are always gentle and soft.



当您们打骂或处罚学生时，就等于在伤害他们的心灵。学生更不会尊重您们，甚至在后面玩弄您们。学生会继续恨您们，排斥您们。这样您们和学生的关系就会相当减少。到了这种地步时，您们觉得他们会做一个好学生吗？一定不会。


Punishing students as if you are breaking their hearts. Will they respect you? Will they like you?Will they be a good student in your eyes? Will they set up a good relationship with you? I don't think so....



所以赏识学生的方法有：


1。 成绩方面


2。 品行方面


3。 其他


Appreciating students from the following ways:


1. In Studies


2. In Attitude


3. Others



一， 成绩方面



老师们想一想，学生考得十分优异时，您们又是称赞又是奖赏；那么那些考得不理想的呢？又是骂又是讽刺又是惩罚！为什么这种学生得不到赏识呢？所以老师们，当学生考不好时，走向前，拍一拍他的肩膀，摸一摸他的头，说：“小民啊！为什么心情不好？是不是考试的问题？没关系，反正你已经尽力了啊！今年考不好，明年再来，我相信你总有一天你的成绩一定会进步的！我问你，失败时是哭的还是笑的啊？”说了那么关怀的话，连我都会感动地流眼泪，心里也想着：老师说我行的，我一定行！学生眼睛一亮，信心和毅力也跟着表现出来了。

多 说 关 怀 的 话, 少 说 伤 人 的 话

1. In Studies

What will you teachers do when students scored high in exams. Good Good Good all the way home, some even bought sweets and chocolates for those students... But... how about those who got poor marks? Scold larh... I am always very curious, why those students cannot be appreciated? Teachers, whenever some students did not score well, just walk towards them, pat them on the shoulder, and say gently:"Never mind, you've tried all your best right? Let's start again next year, ok? I believe you can score well next time. Let me ask you, Failure we--- Cry or Smile?" If that student was me, I would be so touched that I will cry. Teacher says I can do it, so I really can do it!! When a student's eyes start to shine, courageness is tagging along behind him...

二， 品 行 方 面

我也知道您们遇过操行十分恶劣的学生。那么这些学生怎么样被赏识呢？首先，当一位学生在发脾气或在课室捣乱时，第一老师都不能对他大声责骂，这样只会使到他更顽皮。老师应该改正他的错误，用温柔及关怀的语气给予劝告及慰问，而不是在落井下石。第一句就是问他：“为什么今天心情不好啊？发生了什么事可以和老师说吗？说不定老师可以帮你哦！”他听了这一句，自动会知道老师在关心她，就会把事情说出来。老师们就要用同样的语气和他解释，安慰他。下次如果他在重犯，就对全班同学说他进步了许多，叫班上同学给他一个掌声。经过老师们的赏识及辅导，他以后就会像变了另一人似的。

2. In Attitude

All teachers will have surely met students who are very weak in their behaviour. Whenever a student plays pranks in class or does anything bad, teachers should not directly scold them. This will only make them even naughtier. A teacher should console and advise him in a gentle way, not hurting his feelings. First a teacher should ask him(gently):" Why you are so unhappy today? Can you tell me what happened? I can help you." The student will then know that the teacher is caring about him, and he will tell the teacher what happened. Then the teacher should talk or explain to him and help him to overcome the problem. If the student does the same thing but much better next time, teachers should praise him in front of the class. The more the teacher praises and appreciates him, the better the student will be.

三，其他

其他方面就包括了课外活动，分工合作等。老师们都要给予学生赏识，鼓励，及关怀。这样，学生快乐，老师们也快乐，整个学校都充满欢笑声了。可见老师对学生来说是多么重要的呢！

3. Others

This includes Corruriculum, Helping and lots.... Teachers are so important to students because they have to give students happiness, then everyone in the school will also be happy. Appreciate Students, Teachers! :-)

伤感 A Depressed Mood

几天前，在吃晚饭时，想到爸爸为家人煮了几年的饭，就想趁机会感谢他。



过了一会儿，爸爸从客厅走到饭厅。正当我要对他说:" 谢谢”时，谁料到，他突然骂出几句:“ 你吃那么多干嘛？我还没吃呢？你看 ,你看，鸡肉就留那么少！你不觉得很过分吗?” 我那时的嘴顿 时闭起来了，心里觉得好象没必要感谢他，没那个心情说出来了。。。



A few days ago, while I was eating dinner. I thought of saying "Thanks" to Dad for cooking delicious meals for us so many years. So I waited for the opportunity to come.


It did came, when Dad was walking to the kitchen and passing by the dining room. I had not even said the letter "T" as he pointed out and started to complain: " Why are you eating so much? I haven't have my dinner yet! You count yourself how many chicken wings you had ate! Don't you think that you're too selfish?" After I heard this sentence, my mouth couldn't talk! In my heart, I don't think it's worth to thank him... Besides, I don't have the mood to thank him...


有时当我要对父母做些事的时候，他们就会骂我，讽刺我。。。让我没心情去动手。很伤感，很悲哀，想关心他们但又关心不到的那种感觉。。。有时也等于想赏识他们但又赏识不到的遗憾的那种心情。

Sometimes when I want to help my parents, they will always scold or ask me to go away... I don't have the mood and courage to help them because of their bahaviour. I felt very disappointed, very depressed, it's just like the feeling that you want to care for them but you don't dare to... Which is equal to the feeling that you want to appreciate them but you don't dare to...


但是我还是一直在用正面的角度去看待父母哦！

But I always think of my parents positively....

一个正在学习赏识教育的爸爸 Learning Appreciation Education Father

昨天有一位爸爸来行知，向校长指教，一位和我同年小孩的爸爸。校长和这位爸爸谈了很久，发现这位爸爸对待儿子的方法和我的爸爸根本是两回事。我来描述一下这位小孩的爸爸。

Yesterday Principal Tsen invited a father, together with his son, Max Chai. They chatted about appreciation education for quite some time, then I found out that the way this father treated his son is completely different than mine.

这位小孩的爸爸是接受孩子拥抱他的。偶尔会拍一下孩子的肩膀，抚摸孩子。当我听到这一点时，我心想，多么希望我的爸爸能给我一个拥抱，多么希望能亲一下爸爸。。。这位爸爸也每一次都相信他的孩子，认为他的孩子是最棒的。虽然这位孩子在成绩方面是弱了一点，但他的父母都是在鼓励他，安慰他，赏识他，不会嘲笑他的。我很羡慕他的孩子。。。

Max's father accepts hugs from his children. Sometimes he will pat his children on the shoulder, caressing them... In my heart I wished that how happy I am if I can give my father a hug and a kiss without being rejected. Max's father always believe in him nd always think he is the best. Although Max is weak in his studies, his parents keep encouraging him, consoling him, appreciating him and never tease at him.

这位爸爸以前对他的孩子是很严格的，什么事情都一定要父母来处理。但这位爸爸发现有时候真的有急事，所以让孩子管理事情时，孩子都会管理得很好。 所以现在有什么事情都会拜托孩子，把什么事情都交给孩子处理。

Last time, Max's father was always strict to his children, every problem only the parents can solve. But this father found out that sometimes when he really had to hand over some problems to his children, they can solve then very well and fast. And because of that, his parents always gave work for them to do.

孩子曾经对他的爸爸说他不想补习，反正补习也没帮助到他的成绩。他的爸爸就考虑了很久，是不是应该把空间交给孩子，使到孩子对自己有责任感，这种精神就会让孩子独立去学习。听了他说的话，我非常感动。

最后我最希望的是：‘爸爸，我考不好时，还是我心情低落时，不要嘲笑我。。。你给我一个拥抱，我就会很幸福，很感恩我会有这样的好爸爸。’

Max told his father that he did not want tuition, anyway tuition did not help him in his studies. His father thought for a long time, he hesitated that should he return the time to his children, that way only children can have the responsibility to study independantly.

Finally,I want to say to my father:" Daddy, when I am depressed or I did not score well, please don't laugh at me.... Just give a hug, then I will be very thankful to have a father like you."

赏识教育初学者面对的困扰 Difficulties~ Appreciation Education Beginners

由于几千年来，我们都生长在抱怨教育的环境。现在出现了赏识教育，它对我们来说是一个全新的观念，它也是我们一个很陌生的朋友，我们有时都在排斥它。



A long time ago, all of us grew up in the environment of Complaining Education. Appreciation Education is a new friend to us, some of us are eliminating it.



要学习赏识教育，一定会碰到一些挫折与困扰。由于我们身上都沾满了抱怨的恶习，如果要排毒，不但要有足够的勇气，也要有毅力和智慧，去面对恶习的纠缠。



During learning how to appreciate, we will surely face some problems and difficulties. As we are being polluted by Complaining Education, if we want to clear it, we should have enough bravery, full determination and excellent knowledge.



1. 勇气－排毒过程需要无比的勇气，因为我们会不断碰见抱怨教育的忠实支持者。



2. 毅力－排毒过程反反复复需要无比的毅力，因为反反复复我们又会投入抱怨教育的怀抱。由量变到质变也是要有耐心的。



3. 智慧－排毒过程需要无比的智慧，因为我们要练好一双火眼金睛，才不会误入抱怨教育的陷阱。不要像猪八戒那样被外表所迷惑；要学孙悟空火眼金睛透过现象看本质。

1. Bravery- During detoxification process, we must have undefined wisdom and a lot of courage, because from time to time we will meet supporters of Complaining Education.

2. Determination- During detoxification process, we must have undefined determination and patience, because we will start complaining again repeatedly.

3. Knowledge & Wisdom- During detoxification process, we must be trained to have piercing eyes, this is done so that we will not be trapped by Complaining Education.


所以当孩子犯错时，做父母的要去：坚信孩子心灵深处都有个好孩子，自己的孩子永远是最棒的，最乖的。

给父母的话：孩子做好时，你们会赏识他吗？孩子做不好时，你们还会赏识他吗？记得！别人心中的好孩子要用自己心中的好孩子来换取。

Everytime when children make mistakes, parents should always believe that their child are always the best.

赏识的一个晚上 The Night of Appreciation

这件事发生在今年11月4日的晚上，还记得姑姑和曾校长带我去看电影。那时候已经9时了，爸爸突然打电话阻止我看电影。那使我慌张了起来，一直在想怎么用赏识的话去说服父母。看见了父母，我又是可怜的模样，不断地说好话给他们，还哭了出来。但最后还是被逼回家。远远望着姑姑他们往戏院里走，听着姑姑不断地说：“好心情”，心里还是很怨恨父母。但是抵达了家的时候， 我突然想起了赏识教育。我对自己说：“可能他们这么做是为我好吧！”准备睡觉时，妈妈进来我的房间，她说：“骏，妈妈不是不给你去，是妈妈太想你了！我一整天没见到你，妈妈很难过的。”接着，她就给我了一个拥抱，顿时才知道妈妈原来是那么爱我，那么担心我的！那天晚上，我发了短讯给姑姑，感谢他们让我和妈妈相处得那么好。也想和妈妈说：“妈，恭喜你！你进步了！以前我哭时，你会骂我。现在你会给我温暖了！加油哦！”


One night, auntie brought me to the cinema. It's very late, around 9pm. When Dad called me that I could not watch the movie. I was nervous how to persuade my parents. Although how much I talked good things, I started to cry, they still did not let me go. I hate my parents very much at that time until I reached home, I thought of Appreciation Education, I whispered:" They do this because it's for my good. " At home, I was preparing to sleep when Mom came to my room. She said: "Don't you miss me? I miss you a lot so I didn't allow you to see the movie. You can go again next time, right?" I replied if I didn't miss her then I won't call her today. Then she gave me a big hug. I had the feeling of warmth and being loved. I wished her Good Night after that. I just wanted to tell her that:" Mummy, you're improving in your Appreciation education! Keep it up!"


所以，要得到父母的赏识，就要先从自己出发，保持“好心情”的态度，先赏识他们咯！

Start appreciating your parents if you want them to appreciate you! :-)

什么是赏识教育？What is Appreciation Education?

赏识教育就是像学走路，学说话的教育方法。每一位父母一开始都拥有这赏识教育的宝藏，当孩子幼小的时候，刚开始学走路的时候，走了几步又跌倒，父母是在一旁又是鼓掌又是支持。但孩子渐渐长大时，父母都把这赏识教育的宝藏忘了，开始抱怨孩子，责骂孩子，甚至侮辱孩子，就这样渐渐染上了抱怨教育的毒。

Appreciation education educates children in the way when they start to walk and talk. At first, every parent has the key of appreciation. When children started to learn walking, from one time to another, they keep falling. At the same time parents keep encouraging and praising them. But unfortunately when children grow up, most of the parents lost the key of appreciation. Then, they started to scold them, punish them.... and these will hurt their feelings. After some time, they will be the same as their parents too.

赏识教育是一个允许失败，尊重失败和不怕失败的教育方法。对赏识教育来说，失败是喜悦的，失败是被享受的，失败的时候是微笑的。成功时，就应该被赏识；失败时，就更应该被赏识，被鼓励。抱怨教育呢？拒绝失败，轻视失败。成功时，父母表扬孩子；失败时，父母责骂孩子。我真有点想不通，为什么父母不能让我们失败呢？难道他们不懂“失败是成功之母”的道理吗？真正的成功不是一味成功，而是不怕失败。

Appreciation education enables and respects failure. In appreciation education, failure is happiness, everyone should enjoy failure. When one succeed, parents must appreciate them; when one failed, parents should appreciate them more. Whereas complaining education does not allow children to fail. When they fail, parents punish them. I can't have a proper answer, why parents don't let their children fail? "Failure is the mother of success."

那么赏识教育的父母是怎么教育孩子的呢？孩子的优点把它放大10倍，缺点把它缩小10倍。孩子做好时，父母鼓励他们；孩子做不好时，父母更鼓励他们。孩子犯错时，父母好好地劝导后，还是信任他们是好孩子，永远不会怀疑它们是坏的。赏识教育尊重孩子的品格，不会羞辱他们的。赏识教育“惩罚”孩子的方法就是唤醒好孩子的感觉。听过“治标不治本”这个谚语吗？就是只看外表，不看内心。但赏识教育是“治本不治标”。他们内化孩子，让他们心服口服，要长期才能见到效果。孩子做不好，他们不是以生气不满的心情对待孩子，而是以和气和平常心对待他们，不断地为他们打气加油，并轻声辅导孩子。这样孩子不会感受到被排斥，反而感受到被爱。

How appriecation education educates children in the proper way? Appreciation education maximizes children shining points 10 times bigger, and minimizes weak points 10 times smaller. When children do well, parents encourage them; when children didn't do well, parents encourage them more. When children are wrong, parents explain to them gently and thoroughly. They still believe that their children are the best. Appreciation education respects children's behaviour. Appreciation education solves root problems. Parents do not treat their children badly because they did not do well. They keep encouraging them to do well next time. Only this way will let children know that parents love them a lot.

所以赏识教育不只是一种教育方法，它也是与人的相处之道。它不只适合在师生与亲子之间，它也可以应用在夫妻，兄弟，姐妹，同事，朋友。。。等人与人之间的待人处世之道。

Appreciation education is not only a way to educate people around the globe, its also increases people's harmony and relationship between each other. Appreciation education can not only be used between teachers and students, it is also suitable for couples, brothers and sisters, friends and more.... remember:

Sow a complain, reap a failure。

Sow an appreciation, reap a success.